Wednesday, September 22, 2010

Brach's Assorted Halloween Mellowcremes

Maybe I don't give my parents the credit I should.

As kids, they never deprived us of having candy around the house. They just never had good candy. Inevitably, whatever they bought and stuck in the candy dishes kept around the house was cheap bulk candy that even we as little kids understood might be pretty to look at...but was probably best to avoid actually eating. (The lone exception to this rule was Christmas, when -- unless we were really poor that year -- the Palmer candies came out. That was when we got the really good stuff in the festive holiday wrappers.)

Why do I think this may have been a genius move on their part? We could never complain that we didn't get candy because we always had candy. The candy was just so bad that we never wanted to eat it.

One such treat (?) that would often hang around the old candy bowl until Christmas would be the Brach's Halloween or Autumn Mellowcreme mixes. It has been so long since I actually ate a piece of either mix that I can't really remember what they tasted like. I just remember them being extremely sweet. And since Walgreen's had this smallish bag on sale for a dollar, I thought now was as good a time as any to revisit this mix.

There are four flavors to the bag, and eight different shapes. The shapes are all autumn themed: a bundle of wheat, an ear of corn, a cat, pumpkins (one is carved, one is not), a bat, a jug, and a crescent moon. The shapes have no relation to the flavor, but the colors do. So with that in mind we'll review the flavors by color.

Dark Brown: Chocolatey

This was the flavor I remember us fighting each other to get, simply because it was "chocolate." (OK, it's not, but what did we know?)

Taste-wise it reminds me of a super-sweet Tootsie Roll. It's got a vaguely cocoa-like taste. It's kind of a letdown, because your brain sees something that looks like it should be chocolate flavored, and when it's not it's just disappointing. This flavor also absorbs -- for lack of a better way to explain it -- the flavors of the other pieces, so it becomes sort of like the sloppy seconds of the bag. And that works out about as well as it sounds like it would. Basically, ewwww.

Orange: Candy Corn

Ever notice that there are almost no reviews for candy corn on this site? There is a reason for that. In the interest of full disclosure, I feel the need to admit that I don't especially like candy corn. Other than simply "sugar," candy corn doesn't seem to have any flavor to me. But as we all know, I am often willing to take one for the team, so here I am eating something that's candy corn flavored...

So how does it taste? Like sugar that has been flavored with a little bit of vanillin. If you've ever had a single piece of candy corn in your life, you have had this. And after a couple bites, I have had enough.

Tan: Maple

This one at least has the faintest possible smell of maple. Since it is supposed to be maple flavored, that has to be somewhat of a good sign. I seem to recall these being the least popular of the mix amongst us kids. I think that probably had more to do with maple not exactly being a huge flavor with children, rather than because of the candy itself. But as an adult, I am a huge fan of maple flavored anything. So how did these stand up?

Easily the best in the bag. The maple is not the strongest maple ever put in a candy -- in fact, it's definitely on the timid side -- but I give Brach's points for at least attempting to make it taste like real maple rather than like fake pancake syrup.

Yellow: Banana

This was my favorite as a kid. It is all classic fake banana flavor. Ever had a Circus Peanut? Then you have tasted this. I will give this one points for not having that nasty lingering aftertaste that some banana flavored items can have.

The texture of all the pieces is the same regardless of the flavor or color. Think of a really big, dense piece of candy corn. It's soft, yet a little crumbly. The sugar is a little grainy -- and much like candy corn, these candies seem impervious to the march of time. If these had existed in King Tut's time and he'd had a few bags interred with his mummy, I suspect they'd still be more or less edible.

Overall, I can't say that I will be getting another bag. I probably won't even finish this one. Fondant candy is just not my thing; but even with that said, it's not all that bad. It's just not all that good either.

Be sure to also check out Cybele's Candy Blog review of this mix here. She liked them more than I did.





140 calories per 6 pieces of candy.


Packaged on equipment that may contain traces of milk, egg, wheat, peanuts, tree nuts, and soy.



Rodzilla said...

I'll have to try these again to refresh my memory. Even with the absolutely average rating, seeing them makes me want them.

Genius move by your parents by the way.

jMo said...

I am getting so much spam on my blogs it makes me want to pack up the whole thing. One of the major reasons I had to take a break.
Anyway, we always had candy too, but it was stuff like this that we'd only eat if our bodies were completely drained of sugar. We'd put sugar and butter on bread before we'd eat "emergency" candy.
My cousins would put garlic and onion salt on carrots, wrap them in plastic and put them in the fridge to eat later before eating these things.

Yum Yucky said...

If only they contained fiber and protein. LOL! Candy health pills is what I wish they were.

Vin Man said...

I've got to say that these Brach's
(Farley's & Sathers)
Assorted Halloween Mellowcremes
are the most difficult opf all the Mellowcreme types to find. It's like an Easter Egg Hunt to find them at a local store. Good luck if you don't have a Wallgreen's near you! At most locations that sell Halloween Candy; you can find whole walls of almost every Candy Corn mellowcreme type made by Brach's; but not not this Assortment. I don't eat a lot of them but I do feel that they are truely the best of the Mellowecremes offered! So why are they so rare???
If you look these up on line to buy; they are being sold by private Candy sellers for as much as $11.29/11oz bag!!!
It's been a tradition to hunt these down every year but, with the price of fuel it has become a BIG Pain! Please, any store reading this!!! Get them every year with your Brach's order!!!
My Grandkids love them!!!