THE F.A.Q.
Q: Why did you stop making/selling X product? Also, your product sucks! (etc.)
A: What do you mean, my product? Guys, I don't make it, sell it, or dream it up. I just eat it and give my opinions. Your best bet, if you really want to share those thoughts with the people who do make or sell the product, is to Google and contact the company directly.
Q: Where did you get ________?
A: At the bottom of the reviews is always an area that says "purchased from" that will tell you the store/chain/website etc. that I got the product from. If for whatever reason you would like to know a more specific location, leave a comment or send me an email. I will try to provide any additional info I can.
ADDED 1/30/10:
Q: So tell me me how you come up with the prices?
A: Prices are always given in U.S. dollars, current as of the time of the review. Should another option be used, I will be sure to specify. If the item reviewed was a sample (i.e., free to me) I will attempt to get an MSRP for it -- but I may not be able to provide a cost for such items, in which case you guys are on your own. Prices do not include any tax,CRV, shipping, etc. Keep in mind also that if you live in a country other than the U.S., you may have to tack on whatever additional VAT, customs, duties, or import/export fees your government requires. Therefore, prices given must be considered estimates rather than the exact prices. There are many other factors outside of my control, such as discount sales, introductory prices, or geckos that got sick of saving people money on car insurance and may have moved on to foodstuffs.
Q: How do you determine the calories of the product?
A: I take the information directly from the product's label, and will specify what the product considers the portion size to be (example: 100 calories per 2 ounce serving). Sadly, this is sort of cut-and-paste. If left to me, an entire pint of Ben & Jerry's would have 10 calories, period! But alas, that is not how things work in real life.
Q: Why do you moderate your comments, and/or why don't you allow anonymous comments?
A: Spammers, trolls, and other troglodytes who think it's witty to drop F-bombs, racial slurs, or just general douchebaggery. Not surprisingly, the bulk of those people go the anonymous route. I also try to keep all spam, including links to outside sites, off the site. Be glad, people, because I have saved your tender and impressionable eyes from a whole lot of "interesting" pr0n (including some that I would have thought physically impossible).
We do not feed the trolls here. You don't have to agree with my reviews, my personal opinions, or the other commenters' opinions. You don't even have to like the site. And if you would like to state that in a rational, civil manner, I have no problem posting it. However, flaming, baiting, or general bad behavior is not acknowledged in any way. There is a delete button for a reason, folks.
Q: I left a comment but you didn't post it yet! WHY NOT?
A: Because I moderate and I run this site around the rest of my life, rather than vice versa (sadly), I am not always able to approve/post the comments immediately. I do try to post comments as soon as possible, however. (The other possibility is that you fit into one of the categories referenced in the previous question. In that case, don't hold your breath waiting, you'll only turn blue and asphyxiate. Which might not be a bad thing.)
Added 12-31-09:
I also do not post ANY comments with embedded links. Yes, I am aware that the link is often for a credible site or product. Sadly, it often is not. Either way, because I cannot check every link as a blanket rule, no such comments will be published. Occasionally one such comment may get past me, and in that case it will be deleted as soon as I notice it. (I may, however, find a way to post a version of the comment with the link edited out.) I realize this is lame, but there is an ever increasing amount of porn spam coming in this way, and this is the easiest way for me to stay on top of it.
ADDED 1/18/10
The embedded link -- in addition to being the porn spammer's favorite posting tool -- is now being abused by people trying to promote other websites or products. Guess what, guys? You are STILL going to go unposted or have the link edited out. So I will say this once again: If you have a legitimate product or website that you think would be of interest to my readers, email me first. Otherwise, be advised that I will continue to use the almighty DELETE key on your comment.
Q: I have a suggestion for something I want to see reviewed. What do I do?
A: Send an email! I am always open to suggestions.
Q: Your Twitter is not as food-centered as your site -- why is that?
A: This is true. My tweets often center more around what I am actually doing at the time of the tweet than on any given review. I think it adds a small window into what I am like when not eating. Actually, if anything, faithful readers know all too well that I am an insomniac who watches a lot of bad movies while the rest of the world sleeps. I am a big fan of pop culture and I get to address that more in my tweets -- but that does sneak its way into the reviews quite often!
Q: I followed you on Twitter -- why didn't you follow me back?
A: First, thank you! Second, while I do follow many people on Twitter, I like to follow people whose tweets I actually read. I do try to check out everyone who follows me, and I do in turn sometimes follow them. I do not "auto-follow." It's nothing personal -- but otherwise, I would be beating off hot girls who apparently want to show me naked pictures of themselves or meet me for undisclosed amounts of money.
Q: Can you send me free stuff?
A: Sadly, while I would like to buy the world a cola flavored, carbonated beverage with an old jingle written by the great Barry Manilow, I am not actually able to send out random requests of free stuff.
Q: How do you write your reviews?
A: Honestly, it depends. Some reviews for good or for bad write themselves. Others -- even if I liked the item -- seem to take forever. No matter what I am reviewing, I always start with a drink of room temperature water a few minutes before, and without any lingering tastes in my mouth from anything else I may have eaten. The photos are taken moments before eating. With ice cream products, I am maniacal that they not be opened prior to doing the review -- I don't want to risk anything happening to the texture or the flavor from having been opened before I taste it for the first time. This is probably the one rule that drives those who may want to eat said ice cream products just for the sake of eating it, nuts.
Q: Who does your photos?
A: My significant other. Hey, he has to earn my affection somehow, right?
Q: You seem to really like your cat...
A: I am a crazy cat lady!
Q: Is there anything you won't try?
A: Hmm... Over the course of my reviews I have eaten a lot of things that "normal" American people would undoubtedly pass up. Things like durian, candied worms, and chocolate with bacon in it (although that has since gotten pretty popular). Live bugs might be the official line I won't cross. But knowing me, I would probably still really have to think about it. (That doesn't mean you should send me a sample of casu marzu. Apart from the fact that it's illegal in the U.S., the odds are excellent I would simply toss it into a dumpster.)
Q: Where do you find the things you review?
A: Anywhere and everywhere. It can be as simple as the grocery store, drug store, or discount store. At the same time, it might be a speciality shop or website. I am always looking for new items to review, and for me the hunt is part of the fun.
Q: Sometimes you get racy...
A: Who, me? Well yeah, though I try not to cross the line from PG-13 into R. And when I feel like I have, I make sure to headline the post "NSFW" (Not Safe For Work). My day-to-day sense of humor admittedly is a bit more 'adult.' In real life I have a reputation for being able to make anything into a dirty comment if given the chance. (I do, however, have tact...sometimes.)
Q: Do you plan on stopping any time soon?
A: As of this writing I have done around 680 reviews, and no, I am not planning on stopping any time soon. I truly love doing this and plan on keeping at for the foreseeable future.
Q: What is the answer to Life, the Universe, and Everything?
A: 42
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